Monday, December 28, 2009

Everybody funny, now you funny too

Hey y'all and a good day to you,

I have to get this bit out of the way before we begin, just bear with me.

There were some statements taken from passengers who subdued the Christmas bomber on Flight 253 --
Is that flaming acid coming out of your pants or are you just happy to see me?
Everyone knows frying the balls makes them stringy.
That's the new line of terrorist underwear - Fruit of the Boom.
Do you smell hair burning?
Damnit, every time we pickup people from Amsterdam somebody lights themselves on fire.
Yuck, my shirt smells like frying ass.
Al Queda in Yemen? Yeah, I think they own an Olive Garden there.
Those underwear make McDonald's coffee look like a comfortable crotch rinse.
My favorite bumper sticker-"Nigeria, where terror starts in the junk."
And a nod to Yakov Smirnoff-In Nigeria bomb blows up on you!

Ok ok that's enough fun for now. Wait, one more: How bad to you have to hate your crotch to make it go first in an explosion? Whew, ok I'm done. Did you finish? Good.

Well I'm in good spirits and as you could prolly expect Mom is out of the hospital and is home continuing her recovery. Relief abounds. We have to monitor blood pressure and blood sugar to make sure everything continues to be ok. It's good to have her home and happy again.

Well, that's all I have except for more underwear bomb jokes. Like: That was a deliberate trap to assassinate underpants gnomes. Ok, that's it I have to go now and focus on goat stuff as we are quickly approaching the birth spasm.

See ya!

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